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Need help with this situation


Hi I'm a bit unsettled at the moment about a situation a few days ago. I have primarily harm ocd, but had also had suicidal ocd for a while in the past and am generally very fearful of electricity.

Now it happened that the plug of a kitchen appliance got into the water while washing and afterwards I was afraid to put the plug back into the socket.

I left the appliance there for a day, but I was also afraid that someone else might use it.

I then realised that I was trying to avoid the situation and the device. And I was aware that avoidance is not good...

So I thought I would just put the plug in the socket. After all, the appliance had been lying around for a day, and even if there was a minimal chance that it was still wet, nothing would happen to me, but the fuse would blow.

But the situation stressed me out a lot and I had thoughts like, if you don't make sure that the plug really isn't wet and you're really not sure if something will happen, that's negligent.
Then came the thought of whether I would like to kill myself and just pretend that the plug is probably not a danger.
But at the same time I realised how stupid the situation is right now, and that anyone else would just put the plug in and see that nothing happens.

That's what I did and of course nothing happened.

Only unfortunately I got a super bad feeling afterwards because I saw it as negligent.

I don't quite know what would have been better in that situation now, actually insuring yourself or plugging it in like I did? What do you guys say?
It just feels wrong that I plugged it in despite all the doubts and thoughts in my head, precisely because my head partly believed it was a danger and I did it anyway.

I think that because my OCD is very strong at the moment I probably also have depression and I often wonder how this will go on in the future, but I am in therapy and I certainly didn't want to kill myself consciously at that moment.


Hello, you are reassurance seeking which is a compulsion in ocd. Reassurance seeking never gives an answer good enough or for long enough to make the problem go away. It only serves to tighten OCD’s grip and, paradoxically, increase uncertainty and doubt. In fact, many people reach out for professional help because all of their reassurance seeking has increased their doubt and uncertainty to the point that they feel they are going insane. It gets you nowhere except back at the beginning of the ocd cycle. Because of this I am not going to answer any of the concerns you have raised in your post and instead I encourage you to sit with that uncertainty and try hard not to do anything to make it go away. Carry it with you today and increase your skills of allowing yourself not to have to know for sure. Be ok with not solving the problem. It’s not easy, it’s never easy. Reassurance seeking is why people continue to suffer from ocd. Break the cycle and work in some skill building today. Also, try to only bring these concerns up with your therapist as they are skilled at not providing you with the certainty you want and can design a unique exposure for you to practice your response prevention skills. They can also correct any thinking errors by that may be present in the manner you’re reacting to your thoughts but it’s important they do that as they know your case. I know this isn’t what you want to hear but I hope it helps. Best wishes.