.

To REGISTER, LOGIN or access more options, press MENU on mobile.

Need help, harm and false memory!

Quote

I get hurt OCD along with false memory. It all started with the obsessive thought that I suddenly attacked. Pondering it, I imagined the thought that I, as it were, wanted to attack, in order to understand whether it was or not, but this provoked a new thought that suddenly I attacked now. This created a cycle: I thought about the old situation, imagined a thought and immediately a new thought came up and a new OCD situation was obtained. All this lasted a very long time and brought a lot of pain and suffering. I checked the places where my thoughts told me I could suddenly carry a person. Bit by bit, I restored everything in my memory and eventually came to the conclusion that it was all about these considerations themselves. As soon as I imagined a desire or a thought, I immediately thought that I suddenly attacked. That is, as I understood this second of imagination provoked a new thought, which gave rise to the thought: "suddenly I attacked now, suddenly I did not imagine the thought, but suddenly I attacked." This brought panic and excitement. I read about false memory OCD on the Internet and realized that thoughts come on their own there, and in my situation with OCD, I kind of provoke my thoughts myself. This spawned a thought in my head: "Is that all OCD?" But I realized that most likely this is OCD and these very imaginations are obsessive thoughts, they are also rituals, as I was imagining when I tried to solve some past OCD situation. Time passed. OCD got worse. Thoughts were transferred to another location - hatches. Thoughts crept into my head that I suddenly took the person there. I realized that I did not remember leaving the house and taking a person somewhere. I looked at the hatches, trying to understand whether I opened it or not, but I didn't even know which of the many hatches near the house I could carry the person to. I understood that OCD was getting worse. I was getting worse. I have noticed a tendency for a long time now that the new OCD situation overshadows the old one. Once a new strong OCD situation, which brought a lot of panic, overshadowed the old one, but I was able to prove in time that it was not. I started not to react to all thoughts. I was heavily attacked by thoughts. Thoughts constantly entered my head that I needed to think about past situations, I needed to ruminate, but I tried to avoid ruminating. The next day I was again attacked by thought OCD. As soon as I thought about the location, I immediately got the idea that I suddenly attacked. I pondered this situation and imagined a thought. Immediately the thought came that I suddenly attacked. I went to bed. Not having time to wake up, I imagined a thought, the thought came again that I suddenly attacked. I pondered this situation, imagined thoughts and the thought came that suddenly I attacked when imagining. I realized that OCD was pulling me back into the swamp of rumination. Over the next few days, I argued again that it was all OCD. I was looking for evidence that I did not attack. I remember being asleep and starting to think again. The thought came that I suddenly attacked. In the morning I felt awful. The thought came into my head that I suddenly attacked. I did not feel panic and it worried me very much. I lay on the couch and pondered why I did not have a panic. I don't remember how, but the thought occurred to me that I suddenly attacked. The next day I was sitting on the couch, I felt very bad, I was emotional and said that I was a murderer. The thought came to my mind that I suddenly attacked. I realized that I didn’t remember leaving, but the thought came to my mind that I suddenly said so and suddenly I went and suddenly I attacked. I was in a very bad mental state. In the evening I sat at the table and felt a sense of annoyance about the attack. As if feelings of anger climbed and that, as if out of anger, I want to attack. There were feelings that I wanted to attack out of anger. I don't remember how, but the thought occurred to me that I suddenly attacked out of anger. I was in a panic. I understood that I had these feelings, but I did not understand how the thought came to my mind that I suddenly attacked out of irritation. The thought came into my head that I suddenly left the apartment out of irritation and attacked. This situation hit me hard. I realized that I didn’t remember leaving, but thoughts came into my head that I had feelings and suddenly I did, because I had the thought that I suddenly attacked. The thought came into my head that I suddenly attacked with irritation. I'm trying to figure out whether this is another manifestation of OCD or not. It's very difficult for me. I try to understand what happened and the thought that suddenly this is not ocd climb into my head. I understand that I could be in irritation, and then, as it were, imagine a thought, but thoughts come into my head that I suddenly attacked because of irritation. It's very hard for me. Thoughts come to my mind that I suddenly attacked, but I understand that I don't remember leaving. I would like to hear your opinion. Is it OCD?

Quote

This is OCD. You have been ruminating so much. Try to stop ruminating and doing compulsions. You were also seeking reassurance. Try to reduce these things but by bit. You can do this. God bless. 

Quote

Thank you for you reply!  You can say a few words about the situation that I was annoyed about the attack and I had feelings of irritation, and then the thought came that I suddenly attacked. Do you think it's OCD? But I am tormented by the thought that I was annoyed and as if I wanted to attack, and the thought came that I suddenly attacked. Do you think this is a manifestation of OCD?

Quote

Those questions you asked me are reassurance seeking questions. This is OCD please try to stop ruminating. Sorry for being harsh but i went through ocd and you can't seek reassurance if you want to recover. God bless 

Quote

You need to stop ruminating it’s a compulsion. Look up to meet with Ali, NOCD, better help, or a local (even state-wide) ocd specialist. The more you try to figure this out the worse it will get. And stop looking for reassurance!!! It won’t help at all. You need to learn how to stop asking the question.