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HOCD and trigger


I have hocd since last year and its first time that ever happened to me, I am 24 years old male and i get triggered everytime gay like thought appears in my mind. But I have been slowly recovering since few months back after knowing what ocd really is and how much it affects me after everytime I kept believing what ifs as kind of threat. Even though it's almost gone for me I still get triggered like when I talk to myself when I'm alone or I'm thinking randomly when I wake up after some dream even though I have no clear memory if there was one sometimes but saying things or thinking things like ' oh that guy is cute I mean girl ' or ' I want to marry that dude I mean girl ' it just puts me off full awareness and highly sensitive, after trying to escape all the reassurance even with just small things like this really frustrates me and I cant focus on anything else as if my thought process is becoming more gay like and I dont like it at all

I dont understand whys that happening can anyone help me through this like is this due to influence from fear or something? It's making me lose focus on anything else I want to do, I know I dont have any friends that are girls but I really hate to respond to my thoughts like this just because its disturbing.