Quote from Guest on March 22, 2021, 5:24 pmHey, im also very spiritual and understand your beliefs there and how they get super messy with OCD fears, and also false memory is my number one theme.
Repressed/ suppressed memories dont really work this way, the way OCD makes us fear.. usually we repress something if it is something bad that happened to us.. outside of that we can block out, be in denial and avoid bad memories of things we did but it would still be a there in the background as a certainty and on some level we know we are avoiding it, but we never doubt if it happened or not.
Real memory of doing something bad is not something we have to try to figure out, if anything its impossible to forget from the very moment / day it happens.
Also if you had killed somebpdy or any other horrific crime of harm.. you would natuarally go into instant flight or fight mode and realise what consequences would be coming.. you would go into panic.. almost straight away after the crime..
False memory OCD is not always just images.. it can be a sense of emotionally remembering the feeling of these moments , it can be feeling like you remember the feeling on your hands, it can be sounds, smells, facial expressions, and visions and images.. it can be all of it.. but if your still feeling like you cant figure it out, or need to try to figure it out..
then its automatically OCD, in real life you wouldnt need to figure out of it happened or not.. you would know that it did from day one.
I know how terrying this is, your not only obsessing about a past event thats horrific and bad, but also the future consequences if the thought was real.
but I promise you, its always a lie, if it was true.. you wouldnt be on this forum asking if its OCD or not..
that question “is this OCD or not.. “ automatically means it is OCD.
but no amount of reassurance from me or anybody will be enough , especially with false memory, you get reassurance on one detail and it will make the next detail feel even more real and true.
Do what Ali says, track the time, reduce rumination and within days/ weeks/ it will lose power and you will start to see it clearly.