Quote from starstruck on February 5, 2021, 5:24 am
It feels so real. It feels as though I want it even though I don't. I don't know what to do, the thoughts just keep lingering, I can't ignore them forever. I just want it to stop. I want a nice future with a nice husband and kids, this is my ideal future. And now these thoughts are trying to disrupt all of that. I don't want that I just don't. I can't deal with it anymore. And sometimes it feels so real, it feels as though I'm destined to love and be with girls and I really really don't want that and I just don't know what is real anymore. I just want to be normal again. By the way this is day 3 of my mindfulness program.