PUREO OCD CHAT 
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Anonymous204040
Anonymous204040
Hi everyone I need help. I touched my mum in an inapproprite place due to an OCD urge. I tried to explain it to her in a way she would understand without freaking her out. I explained that I got a sensation in my hand and that I was fixated on the idea that I might do it (because that's where the urges come from), but I didn't actually tell her I had an urge. She told me nothing happened and that
I need to get it out of my head but because of what little context she has, I don't believe her. Should I listen to her or is this something to worry about?
Anonymous204040
Hi everyone I need help. I touched my mum in an inapproprite place due to an OCD urge. I tried to explain it to her in a way she would understand without freaking her out. I explained that I got a sensation in my hand and that I was fixated on the idea that I might do it (because that's where the urges come from), but I didn't actually tell her I had an urge. She told me nothing happened and that
Anonymous204260
@Anonymous204260:
Anonymous204040
Anonymous204269
Oh, you're welcome, I can only hope I was of some help. Sorry for all the initial typos! I'm on mobile right now.
You absolutely were, thank you. You helped me to disregard. And I'm happy to help anyone else who may be suffering like myself. I wouldn't wish this on anybody
Anonymous204269
I know it's hard--it was and can still be for me--to trust yourself without perfect evidence, but make the choice because you want to. There's no other criteria to meet, no other reason needed.
Anonymous204269
Oh, you're welcome, I can only hope I was of some help. Sorry for all the initial typos! I'm on mobile right now.
Anonymous204040
Anonymous204269
You won't, because at your core, it's not who you are. You'd rather torture yourself mentally than ever intentionally harm her.
Yeah that's true. Thank you for your help, I really really appreciate it
Anonymous204269
You won't, because at your core, it's not who you are. You'd rather torture yourself mentally than ever intentionally harm her.
Anonymous204040
Anonymous204269
It's clear to me that your mother is dear to you, and that you'd never harm her, which is why OCD has picked her as today's subject.
POCD and SA OCD are my main themes yeah. I'm very afraid of myself, that I will act on my urges. i don't want to do anything bad, I'm just worried I'll lose control
Anonymous204269
It's clear to me that your mother is dear to you, and that you'd never harm her, which is why OCD has picked her as today's subject.
Anonymous204269
It doesn't make a difference. Before, after--it was just a thought. Nothing came of it. You didn't take advantage of your mother.
Anonymous204040
Anonymous204269
You weren't acting on a dark urge. All she did was sit down on your bed, and you felt it on your leg, and you had an OCD urge/feeling in response.
No see I already had the urge when she came in. That's why I didn't want her sitting down on the bed
Anonymous204269
You weren't acting on a dark urge. All she did was sit down on your bed, and you felt it on your leg, and you had an OCD urge/feeling in response.
Anonymous204040
Anonymous204269
No, you weren't taking advantage of her. Sitting on a bed isn't inherently sexual, it's a neutral act, and it probably would've been odd to not allow your mother to sit down when she wanted to.
But I had sexual urges towards her, and I felt like I was acting on them in that moment because when she sat down, I felt it on my leg and I just allowed myself to feel the urges and feelings and everything.
Anonymous204269
No, you weren't taking advantage of her. Sitting on a bed isn't inherently sexual, it's a neutral act, and it probably would've been odd to not allow your mother to sit down when she wanted to.
Anonymous204040
Anonymous204040
She sat on my bed and it felt like I wanted her to because of the urge, even though I didn't. I wanted to tell her no. Don't. But I couldn't explain why. So when I felt her on my leg, I just let it happen for a second BECAUSE OF THE URGE and then fought to get rid of it and get away from her touch the rest of the time. I literally took advantage of her for that second. I enjoyed it.
I did mental compulsions for the rest of the time but when it started I didn't
Anonymous204040
She sat on my bed and it felt like I wanted her to because of the urge, even though I didn't. I wanted to tell her no. Don't. But I couldn't explain why. So when I felt her on my leg, I just let it happen for a second BECAUSE OF THE URGE and then fought to get rid of it and get away from her touch the rest of the time. I literally took advantage of her for that second. I enjoyed it.
Anonymous204040
Anonymous204269
It can feel like that, but it isn't true. I've dealt with the same theme as you, and looking back on it now, I know all of those instantaneous responses, urges, and thoughts weren't true. They came up because I was afraid I might want to harm the people I love most in the world.
I understand that part I really do. But am I not at least taking advantage of her sitting there by not moving and feeling like I'm enjoying it? And it felt like I really did. I couldn't ask her to move and I really wanted her to but when she first sat down, I felt like I really liked it and I was taking advantage
Anonymous204269
It can feel like that, but it isn't true. I've dealt with the same theme as you, and looking back on it now, I know all of those instantaneous responses, urges, and thoughts weren't true. They came up because I was afraid I might want to harm the people I love most in the world.
Anonymous204040
Anonymous204269
You didn't. I know you didn't, but it doesn't matter what I know, it matters what you think.
But I felt it emotionally. I should have tried to move immediately. But I've been having urges to touch her that I haven't acted on. But then we made contact and I didn't move because of how strong the urge felt. Is that not me acting on the urge?
Anonymous204269
You didn't. I know you didn't, but it doesn't matter what I know, it matters what you think.
Anonymous204040
Anonymous204269
Don't put such significance on your urges, your thoughts, and your immediate reactions. They're all informed, shaped, and fuelled by OCD right now. I know it's hard, but you must remember that you're not your thoughts, urges, or impulses.
I understand that but I think I acted on one. I knew I felt the sexual urge and I didn't fight it BECAUSE of it. I felt like I enjoyed it
Anonymous204269
Don't put such significance on your urges, your thoughts, and your immediate reactions. They're all informed, shaped, and fuelled by OCD right now. I know it's hard, but you must remember that you're not your thoughts, urges, or impulses.
Anonymous204040
Anonymous204269
Many people who live with OCD doubt they have it, and figuring out if you have OCD can become it's own theme. You want objective, infallible proof that you have it, but that kind of proof doesn't exist.
Whether I have OCD or not, I just want to know if I did a bad thing
Anonymous204269
Many people who live with OCD doubt they have it, and figuring out if you have OCD can become it's own theme. You want objective, infallible proof that you have it, but that kind of proof doesn't exist.
Anonymous204040
Anonymous204040
The reason I feel like I took advantage of her is because I knew I was having the sexual urges and accepted them as I felt her on my bed
And the reason I didn't do anything to stop her was BECAUSE of the urge. I would have let her do it if I didn't have the urge of course but the reason is very important
Anonymous204040
Anonymous204040
I didn't even want her to because I've been having intrusive sexual urges. I allowed myself to enjoy the sensations I got for 1 second before fighting to get away from her and forcing myself to have other thoughts so that I wouldn't have the urges
The reason I feel like I took advantage of her is because I knew I was having the sexual urges and accepted them as I felt her on my bed
Anonymous204040
Anonymous204269
It sounds a lot like OCD to me. Allowing your mother to sit down on your bed isn't sexual assault or evidence of you taking advantage of her. Sometimes a bed is a convenient place to sit down, it's a neutral act.
I didn't even want her to because I've been having intrusive sexual urges. I allowed myself to enjoy the sensations I got for 1 second before fighting to get away from her and forcing myself to have other thoughts so that I wouldn't have the urges
Anonymous204269
Anonymous204040
Have I taken advantage of her? I have obsessions around sexual assault and predatory behaviour but I don't know if it's OCD
It sounds a lot like OCD to me. Allowing your mother to sit down on your bed isn't sexual assault or evidence of you taking advantage of her. Sometimes a bed is a convenient place to sit down, it's a neutral act.
Anonymous204040
Anonymous204040
Hello I'm struggling from what I think are OCD urges and I wanted to ask, if my mum sits on my bed and I don't do anything to stop her because of the urge I'm having for a split second, am I acting on that urge?
Have I taken advantage of her? I have obsessions around sexual assault and predatory behaviour but I don't know if it's OCD
Anonymous204040
Hello I'm struggling from what I think are OCD urges and I wanted to ask, if my mum sits on my bed and I don't do anything to stop her because of the urge I'm having for a split second, am I acting on that urge?
Anonymous204270
Why doesn't Ali talks about real event ocd??
Anonymous204262
I'm struggling so bad with my false memory OCD and my mom doesn't understand she yells at me and thinks I can just get over it!
Anonymous204260
I have eco harm ocd i cant buy new clothes shoes etc due to guilt of environment harm and i am not enjoying material things
Flaaffy
Since I've stopped examining my initial mental and/or physical reactions, I don't freeze up or hold my breath nearly as often as I used to. It's infrequent, and when it does happen, I do my best to disregard and move on. It's hardest when you're just starting your recovery, but letting your initial reaction go without comment gets easier with practice.
Flaaffy
Don't place any significance in your initial reaction. The goal is to let intrusive thoughts come and go without paying them much mind. I used to interrogate myself over my reactions, but the internal conversations were always unproductive, ending with me spiralling and doubting my memory of my reaction.
Flaaffy
Anonymous204175
them'. Like my OCD makes me think I feel something for them, you know? Which definitely isn't the case but it just stresses me so much
What you've described is normal, because they're the subject of your intrusive thoughts. I sometimes freeze up or hold my breath when an intrusive thought involving the person I'm interacting with comes up, but then I disregard the thought and continue to interact with the person.
Anonymous204176
anyone here
Anonymous204175
Anonymous204175
Hello, I'm also a sufferer from OCD. I wanted to ask if it's normal to sometimes get weird feelings around a person that you're having intrusive thoughts about. Like do you know the feeling when your heart stops for a moment out of shock or something? I had intrusive thoughts about this person that scared me and made me panic. Now I can't stop obsessing over the feeling I had when I was around the
them'. Like my OCD makes me think I feel something for them, you know? Which definitely isn't the case but it just stresses me so much
Anonymous204175
Hello, I'm also a sufferer from OCD. I wanted to ask if it's normal to sometimes get weird feelings around a person that you're having intrusive thoughts about. Like do you know the feeling when your heart stops for a moment out of shock or something? I had intrusive thoughts about this person that scared me and made me panic. Now I can't stop obsessing over the feeling I had when I was around the
Anonymous204144
Assalamwalicum.I'm new in this forum.I have pure O
Flaaffy
It'll be really scary at first, but it will get easier. It can be hard to disengage, and you're going to find it'll shift themes as you become resistant to the pull of intrusive thoughts. It can take some time, so take it at your own pace. Just give yourself the permission to treat it like OCD and recover.
Flaaffy
Anonymous204040
If I got the arousal sensation and let it happen, does it count as sexual assault?
Make the choice to treat it as OCD. Make the choice to trust yourself. If you're anything like me, you're going to want evidence you can trust yourself, but don't fall for that trap. Don't trust yourself because you have good reason to, do it because you want to. That's it.
Flaaffy
Anonymous204040
Please I really need an answer. I'm terrified this isn't OCD.
You've described something very normal--someone accidentally brushing against someone else as they're passing by--and you're afraid you enjoyed it, or created the circumstances for it to happen, which are classic OCD thoughts. The trouble is, I can tell you it's OCD, and you won't truly believe me. It doesn't matter what I think, it matters what you think.
Flaaffy
Anonymous204040
If I got the arousal sensation and let it happen, does it count as sexual assault?
The reason you're upset by what happened is because the thought of harming your mother like that goes against your core values. It's simply not who you are, but you don't trust yourself, so OCD is only too happy to seize this opportunity to attack your core values.
Flaaffy
plenty of time to work toward recovery. It's going to be hard at first, but it will get easier. When a thought like that comes up, disregard it. It's scary to trust yourself when you don't think you can, or that you don't deserve to: trust yourself anyway.
Flaaffy
Anonymous204040
Please I really need an answer. I'm terrified this isn't OCD.
I don't think you're a child molester. The reason this incident upsets you is because molesting a child goes against your core values, and OCD loves nothing more than to attack our core values. What you've described sounds like OCD to me, but it doesn't matter what I think: what matters is what you think. Make the choice to treat it like it is OCD, and give yourself
Anonymous204040
Anonymous204040
Hi I'm desparate for an answer. If my leg is touching another person's leg and I get an ocd urge and act on it by leaning in slightly, am I a child molester? Did my molest my cousin? Does this count as acting on an OCD urge? I'm pretty sure it does but I can't bare the thought
Please I really need an answer. I'm terrified this isn't OCD.
Anonymous204040
Hi I'm desparate for an answer. If my leg is touching another person's leg and I get an ocd urge and act on it by leaning in slightly, am I a child molester? Did my molest my cousin? Does this count as acting on an OCD urge? I'm pretty sure it does but I can't bare the thought