OCD Help Chat 
Anonymous179059
Anonymous179059
I remember well when I was about 10 me and a friend read a book about sexual things. There was a passage where it said something like„when the p***s gets aroused more and more there happens e*********n“. I remember being turned on by that thought and even masturbating to it later. This is the thought that by far is producing the most anxiety and is like a 100% proof that I‘m at least bi. I
I mean how can someone be straight if he was jerking to dicks an was aroused by these thoughts? I never ever chased men in real life or thought about doing something with their dicks but like I said in certain situations I was turned on by them. In Real Life I only was turned on by girls not one time by men. It feels like before puberty I was gay, in puberty straight then.
Helmut Schmacker Afternoon chaps, how's it going today?
Anonymous179093 Can someone help me please how to deal with these memories
Helmut Schmacker
Anonymous179093
Can someone help me please how to deal with these memories
Are you the HOCD sufferer above, worried about your childhood memories?
Anonymous178601 I think I am going to stop reading articles and the videos I have been using as exposures. I will be watching them ones in a while. That wouldn't be avoidance would it?
Seamstress
Helmut Schmacker
Afternoon chaps, how's it going today?
Better couple of days. Back to tracking - by pen and paper. I would say most times I am 80% recovered. Just this silly 20% that I seem to fall back into when I am anxious.
Anonymous178601 I want to make sure I am doing erp properly
Seamstress
Anonymous178601
I want to make sure I am doing erp properly
Perhaps you were doing too much before. Maybe reduce exposures and be successful and then go on from there increasing gradually.
Anonymous178601 Ivwas watching a few videos a day. I mean I barely have any anxiety left there are occassions I get a little bit of anxiety but not super high also the only thing that remains so far are the thoughts and thats it. Also the videos arent something I would be watching everyday if I was my old self.
Helmut Schmacker
Seamstress
Better couple of days. Back to tracking - by pen and paper. I would say most times I am 80% recovered. Just this silly 20% that I seem to fall back into when I am anxious.
Evening Seamstress. 80% recovered is a pretty good place to be, even if you can't quite see the finishing line at the moment. Give the tracking more chance to work and maybe just aim for a little improvement each day. Be the tortoise and not the hare 🐢🏁
Seamstress
Anonymous178601
Ivwas watching a few videos a day. I mean I barely have any anxiety left there are occassions I get a little bit of anxiety but not super high also the only thing that remains so far are the thoughts and thats it. Also the videos arent something I would be watching everyday if I was my old self.
Sounds like you are doing well and know what you are doing re:ERP
Anonymous179108
Helmut Schmacker
Are you the HOCD sufferer above, worried about your childhood memories?
Yes I am
Helmut Schmacker
Anonymous179108
Yes I am
OK. My opinion, for what it's worth, is that you're placing far to much importance on what seems to be some pretty insignificant childhood memories. All kids are curious about s*x and many will experiment. Keep going on with the recovery work (watch Ali's videos if you get stuck) and work on reducing the time you spend ruminating about such things. Good luck.
Anonymous179118
Helmut Schmacker
OK. My opinion, for what it's worth, is that you're placing far to much importance on what seems to be some pretty insignificant childhood memories. All kids are curious about s*x and many will experiment. Keep going on with the recovery work (watch Ali's videos if you get stuck) and work on reducing the time you spend ruminating about such things. Good luck.
Okay I understand. But how to react because I really get the feeling if once I was aroused and jerked of to dicks and sexuality can’t change then now I‘m too. How to react to that proof?
Helmut Schmacker
Anonymous179118
Okay I understand. But how to react because I really get the feeling if once I was aroused and jerked of to dicks and sexuality can’t change then now I‘m too. How to react to that proof?
These childhood experiences do not prove that you're gay. If you weren't suffering from HOCD, you would view these thoughts as irrelevant and not be troubled by them. Keep doing the recovery work (reducing compulsions and rumination) and disregard thoughts related to your theme.
Anonymous179146 Hello I have severe harm OCD… i’ve had for the past few days severe anxiety every waking moment bc i’m afraid i’m gonna kill my cats… tho i know i would never do it… I BUT… when I was younger 13-16 i would act on harmless intrusive thoughts (nothing about actual harm, just weird stuff) and my OCD keeps telling me that bc of that, i am MORE LIKELY to act on my thoughts than anyoneelse
Anonymous179146 I know im not a psychopath, and that i love my cats and dont wanna harm them ever… but i fear i will suddenly do it anyway to ”get the thought out of my head ”
Anonymous179146 Does this mean i’m dangerous for real bc i acted on harmless stuff before
Seamstress
Anonymous179146
Does this mean i’m dangerous for real bc i acted on harmless stuff before
These are just OCD tricks trying to draw you into ruminating, seeking reassurance, doing compulsions etc. Let the thoughts be there nagging in the background without fighting them and perhaps try to engage in something to re-focus your mind and thoughts. ali has many videos on harm OCD etc.
Anonymous179146
Seamstress
These are just OCD tricks trying to draw you into ruminating, seeking reassurance, doing compulsions etc. Let the thoughts be there nagging in the background without fighting them and perhaps try to engage in something to re-focus your mind and thoughts. ali has many videos on harm OCD etc.
Thanks for your answer! I am currently going through her whole playlist on harm OCD, thats how i found this forum!
Anonymous178601 Can ocd attack your memories? Or is that just me analyzing. I believe I might be having false memory during recovery I dont know if thats ocd trying to trick me.
Anonymous178601 To get me to ruminate and make reassurances
Anonymous179199 im really worried about whether or not its really pocd, i keep getting memories and stuff and its making me scared
Anonymous178601
Anonymous179199
im really worried about whether or not its really pocd, i keep getting memories and stuff and its making me scared
Look up Ali greymonds False memory ocd. If you are doing active recovery work your mind might be trying to twist things. To get you to rumminate. Or so I believe but lets wait for Seamstress to answer because I am on first stage recovery in my theme of ocd.
Anonymous178601 Does anyone else get frustrated. Is it normal I get frustrated at the thoughts because I have had enough. There are nights I am good and then there are nights where I am really frustrated.
Anonymous178601 I have just been going through a roller coster of emotions. Sometimes I am sad sometimes I am okay sometimes I feel like throwing up because of the thoughts. However I dont know if that means I am in the right track to recovery I disregard the thoughts. I barely do any compulsions unless its really bad. However its very little to non. Is this normal in recovery?
Seamstress
Anonymous178601
Look up Ali greymonds False memory ocd. If you are doing active recovery work your mind might be trying to twist things. To get you to rumminate. Or so I believe but lets wait for Seamstress to answer because I am on first stage recovery in my theme of ocd.
Remember I am no expert - just a fellow sufferer trying to help others when I can. My input would be that OCD feels very real and can attack memories. The more you focus on these thoughts the stronger they will get.
Anonymous179243
Anonymous178601
I have just been going through a roller coster of emotions. Sometimes I am sad sometimes I am okay sometimes I feel like throwing up because of the thoughts. However I dont know if that means I am in the right track to recovery I disregard the thoughts. I barely do any compulsions unless its really bad. However its very little to non. Is this normal in recovery?
Yes I'm in the same boat
Anonymous179243
Anonymous178601
Does anyone else get frustrated. Is it normal I get frustrated at the thoughts because I have had enough. There are nights I am good and then there are nights where I am really frustrated.
Me too. I get frustrated extremely easy
Anonymous179243 I'm having trouble consistently reducing rumination. It just happens it feel like. Idk if they are intrusive thoughts or rumination . Anyone have trouble telling the 2 apart
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Anonymous179251 Can someone please share some advice? I am super hyperaware of my thoughts and what I am thinking about since I’ve read about pure o OCD. I have no certain theme, but I constantly analyze my thoughts to “check” for intrusive thoughts. So much anticipation - it feels like wearing goggles and viewing the world in an intrusive mindset
Anonymous179251 I am stuck in this cycle for 3 months and it feels 24/7. Even seeing flowers evokes an intrusive thought - idk what to do or how to break out of this meta ocd obsession
Anonymous177485
Anonymous179251
I am stuck in this cycle for 3 months and it feels 24/7. Even seeing flowers evokes an intrusive thought - idk what to do or how to break out of this meta ocd obsession
Refocus is key. I been in it for 8 months
Anonymous178601 My rumminition time is more down today but I have been feeling really sad.
Anonymous178601 Is this common
Anonymous178601 I feel sad then I feel nothing then I feel sad again and so on
Anonymous178601 Also does anyones anxiety kick up when they are sleeping and wake up with a fast beating heart ready to burst?
Anonymous178601 Usually I wake up with ocd thoughts rushing through my head I try not to react to them but its hard at times especially at night. I am sure I will end up passing out here soon.
Anonymous178601 But just wanted to see if this has happened to you guys
Anonymous177485
Anonymous178601
Usually I wake up with ocd thoughts rushing through my head I try not to react to them but its hard at times especially at night. I am sure I will end up passing out here soon.
Yes
Anonymous179288 is it normal for fear to increase when trying to ignore my ocd?
Anonymous179288 and my chest has been feeling pressure since I stopped o****m, and when I go to the bathroom now too. It feels like ocd telling me to just o****m again.. Is that true? Cn I just ignore it and move on?
Anonymous179288 anyone there?
Anonymous179325 hey, is this place active?
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Anonymous178601
Anonymous179325
hey, is this place active?
From time to time
Anonymous178601 Can false memory feel real?
Anonymous179324
Anonymous178601
Can false memory feel real?
Of course, all OCD thoughts can feel real. That is what feeds the OCD - the fear of it being real. Ali has many videos on the subject. Check them out.
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