My religious ocd comes when I do the smallest things and makes them seem like a sin

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I’m currently 11 years old, I believe I’ve had my ocd since I was 8. At that age I started following in my mother’s footsteps and started to focus more on Jesus. I was incredibly happy and relaxed. I loved my religion. But then my religious ocd came. It started off pretty small. Looking back on it, I could likely handle it with ease. But my thoughts got more and more advanced as time went on. Basically everything I do, my thoughts come in saying I’m insulting Jesus, or if I do this I’m insulting Jesus. Here’s what I’m struggling with right now. I can’t move my fingers or pick up anything or eat because my thoughts come in saying I’m insulting Jesus just because I moved my fingers. But I’m not doing any sort off evil sign. I just move my fingers or rub them on a surface, I’ve always done that. So what I started doing is what Ali greyhound said in her q&a video for religion. I would ignore or not agree with the thoughts and continue what I was doing. But of course, ocd is really hard. Can anyone help me?

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Sorry, there was a auto correct for Ali greymond when I wrote it

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I do feel sometimes like I’m getting better and I know the thoughts are not real. I just want to know how to stop them and completely disregard them

 

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UPDATE: Feeling a lot better now, I know recovery is a process, I feel like Jesus is with me right now and understands me.

still though, any help would be greatly appreciated 

 

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Hello. Jesus loves you and is closer to you than ever through this suffering. I have struggled with this type of OCD for over a year and am just starting to recover. Do not worry that it is sinful it is not. You have no control over this and the insults your ocd says mean nothing because you don't mean them. You love Jesus. The way I started to recover from this is by realizing this is ocd. God does not want me to live like this. God loves you and is with you. This suffering is an invitation to participate in his  suffering. This is your " agony in the garden". You are not alone. Jesus himself underwent psychological pain. Jesus loves you.

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Yes ocd can be very very hard, especially in the beginning of recovery. Try to reduce compulsions and rumination as much as you possibly can. You can do this, God bless:)

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Thank you all so much! I understand that Jesus knows my true intentions and feelings and that I’m just trying to live life 🙂

it’s good that I know now, since my family started catching on that I’m feeling depressed or am not feeling well. It’s weird how life works. I started out as some laughing child who everyone loved. And since I got this ocd everything went downhill to the point I actually felt like I was evil beyond recover

no worries though, that’s just the ocd talking 🙂

I will get through this, after all I did give my life to Jesus at church, nothing is stopping me now ?

 

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I must say my religious way was similar to Yours. There was a time when I was discovering Jesus Christ and it was beautiful. Praying, going to church, attending in holy masses – it was all making me happy.

But then I started feeling that something is wrong. I started seeing evil and sin everywhere. I was confessing compulsively, talking to priests, avoiding church, but it wasn’t helping me.

Ordinary daily activities become extremely hard for me, because I was always feeling that I am sinning. I felt abandoned. 

First, You have to understand, that fear never comes from Jesus Christ. Fear is not something, that Jesus would like You to feel. People are made to feel joy, happiness by living with faith. Not anxiety.

I started feeling better, when I understood that God loves me, He knows that I am struggling with OCD. Once I said to myself “Jesus, I know You love me. I know that doing that compulsions will not help me. I know that this is not Your will that I am feeling this way. This is my cross and I have to overcome it. I trust You and I want to try living like normal, ordinary man”

Jesus wouldn’t be happy if we perceive Him as a judge. He is out friend.

Try to live the way that ordinary people would live. If you think in Your head, that something little is not a sin, (that may be really ridiculous thing, I know because I was in that moment too) then do not treat that as a sin. Try to live, do normal things that You used to.

Remember one thing: anxiety eventually will come down. It will not stay with You with that high level. Live with the thought that even if You are feeling terrible, You will feel better in some period of time.

I think you should tell Your family about that how You are feeling, about OCD. It is good to have Your family with You when You are feeling really bad