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Harm OCD around my child

This is my worst nightmare and I have thought of suicide many times. My OCD was triggered after huge stressors in life and watching the Chris Watts documentary. Never have had dealt with harm intrusive thoughts until that point. I feel like I can never look at myself the same and my anxiety around my son is uncomfortable.

I miss who I was and never having doubts but that’s al I do now. I even question if this is Ocd or not. I can cry everyday, I hate my life.

I used to be the same. But I promise it gets better. OCD loves to make you doubt.

Try to stop ruminating. Have you watched any of the videos Ali has put up about Harm OCD?

Yes, I’ve watched multiple times. It helps but it comes back and I know it’s compulsions..