Quote from Seamstress on February 3, 2021, 8:52 am
It sounds to me like you are doing quite well by delaying rumination which is part of the recovery process. I think it is a trick from OCD that is causing your doubting as OCD is the "doubting" disease. It concerns me that you said that when you go to your therapist it is like paying for reassurance. In order to recover from OCD you need to be practicing ERP - that is what is the standard method of recovery as far as I know. Make sure that your therapist is trained in OCD. I know from experience that even if they say they are they may not use the proven methods. A previous therapist of mine did not know what ERP meant and I had to explain it to them. Also they said said if the compulsions I did didn't hurt anyone to not worry about it - which I totally disagree with - they hurt me. Remember you are hiring them and you are paying for their services. Make sure they are actually helping you recover and not making it worse.